Some words are generally considered abhorrent within our society.  However, with all of these words, a speaker usually won't know the word is abhorrent until they have used it in a way that causes a negative reaction from anyone listening to the speaker.  That's how I found out some of the most dangerous words in our vocabulary are considered extremely offensive to some portions of our population.  Typically, after learning that lesson I make a concious effort to not use the offensive word again unless I'm either relaying a past conversation with someone or I am making some sort of commentary on the word or words in question as I am about to do.  Thus, be prepared for an onslaught of words that are generally considered offensive by the population at large.

Fuck, Nigger, and Cunt are three words that jump out, in my mind, as offensive to most people in our society.  I don't believe I ever used Fuck in a way that led me to learn it was offensive - I think I just picked that up from the dialog of people around me.  Same with Cunt.  In fact I find that word more offensive than Fuck - probably because it is used as a mysogonistic term meant to belittle an entire segment of the population.  Nigger is in a class by itself because not only does it belittle an entire segment of the population but becuase our societyis hyper-sensitve to the word to the pont where it comes in two forms; nigger and "the n-word."

I learned how offensive nigger is when I was about seven.  Previous to that day I had no idea nigger could be used as a word all by itself and I definitely didn't know it was used as a pojorative term directed at the entire population of black people in the United States.  I guess that's just one more of the minor privledges bestowed on me for being white.  I didn't know a word could have that much power or have such a profound effect on another person or group of people.  To me it was just part of the name of a prank.

You see, when I was about seven my parents went out for the night and some kids came by and played an age old prank on my brother and I.  They knocked ran away before we answered the door leaving us wondering who was fucking with us.  Yeah, we used fuck as a word quite a bit even when we were little - just not around adults.  Later that night, when our parents came home my dad asked me if anything had happened.  I said, "no, nothing much, just some kids nigger-knocking."

It was at that point, and for the next few minutes as my ass got worn out by my father, that I learned how horrible a word nigger was.  And, from that moment on I didn't say it again.  I adopted the "n-word" as a place holder when discussing it just as polite society dictated I should.  I've never used the word in a hateful way or to describe a person.  I've never even thought of a person as a nigger.  My dad's explaination (and accompanying ass-whippin) were sufficient to get the point across.  I don't normally find myself in conversations where nigger is a word that has any place in it; unless we are discussing that word specifically and even then once the word is introduced it is usually easy to get around the use of it by just referencing "the word".

I don't like saying it - it has an ugly feel on my tongue.  I don't like writing it either.  It's just an ugly word and each time I come across it 300+ years of horrible history smack me in the face.

But, thanks to Louis C.K., a comedien, I don't like the n-word either.  I'm not going to repeat his insightful commentary - instead here is a video.

He's right; it's a cowardly way of approaching the topic and people do need to take responsibilty for their own shitty choice of words.

Of course, not every word has as much baggage as nigger.  Some words are used in jokes and are still highly offensive to different segments of our population; words like "Jap" or "Wop" - or using "Jew" as an adjective; like "he really jewed me".  Those are each really shitty choices of words and cause unnecessary harm when used - obviously not physical harm but emotional harm.  Plus, they damage you in the eyes of those you are speaking to which has a detrmintal effect on the conversation or partnership you're trying to participate in.

I've never used those words either.  I've always avoid them and pollack, spick, wetback, chink, and many more.  I've always known, at least since I was seven, that those were shitty words and that it isn't even good to think in those terms.  But I have always used "gyp" in the context of saying someone ripped me off.

It turns out "gyp" is no better than Jew, kike, wop, or even nigger.  It is a stereotypical term applied to the Roma people.  Now, to be honest, until I learned about "gyp" I didn't really know there was a "Roma" people or that gypsy meant the Roma or that gyp was short for gypsy.  I didn't know any of that and nobody ever took me to the woodshed to explain why it was patently offensive to say gyp.  It's like saying all of the Roma are crooks who rip you off. It's just like saying all Jews are cheap.

Honestly, not saying "gyp" is harder for me than not saying any of those other words.  I have a lifetime of practice using gyp as a part of my normal vocabulary.  Some who read this might think I'm just being politically correct.  Well, you're right I am.  Because most of the time being politically correct just means not being a racist or sexist asshole.  I'd prefer not to be a racist asshole to any Roma I happen to meet and I don't want to help keep the term gyp alive as a slander against those people (even if most people, just like me, don't know gyp == "Roma insult")

This is probably the first time I've ever tried to conciously remove a word from my vocabulary.  I've not really given this as much thought as this post might indicate.  In fact, when I first read about how gyp=Roma insult, I thought "Fuck! How is gyp an insult and why should I change?"

But then, I thought - what if Gyp had the same heady weight that nigger did in our culture.  Would I want to use it then?  Would we suddenly start saying "the g-word?"    Seriously, go back and read this article and replace nigger with gyp everytime.  Imagine that same kind of discomfort everytime you said gyp.  Imagine saying nigger to a black person and their reaction; the anger and humilation that they might feel.  Now imagine how a Roma person would feel if you used gyp to them.  I doubt it's much different.  That's why I don't want to use gyp to mean "rip off" anymore.  It's a bullshit way for me to talk and it's lazy.

Fortunately,for me, I have another word I also like to use, "Chinch" or "Chinchy"; for instance today, at Steak Escape I know I did not get a full portion of steak on my sandwich.  Previously I might have thought, "Boy, the cook really gypped me on my steak" but now I can safely say "He chinched me on my steak"

Chinchy has no racial or ethnic background - it just means "cheap, singy, miserly" and is actually more appropriate in meaning to how I always used gyp anyway.  It wasn't like I was ever actually ripped off.  It's a perfect word to describe my feeling when I feel like I didn't get my fair share of something and it has no baggage (please tell me it has no baggage).